Another way to look at your mishap

In 2007, the US country music singer Dolly Parton turns 61.

I had seen several of her movies. Her squeaky voice, golden hair (a wig), and -- of course, one couldn't possibly overlook it -- her shape of body are almost her trademarks.

She grew up in a poor and ragged family of 12 children living in a single-room shack in Tennessee, and had always wanted to look pretty. She admitted putting on heavy make-up even at home because "I never know who is going to come by, but I don't want to look like a slouch for my husband either."

People tend to judge her by her look. In fact, Dolly has more than what meets the eyes. Her song writing skills and singing had turned into a business worth millions of dollars. She even sets up her own Dollywood theme park in Nashville, the Mecca for Western country music. More than that, she sets up a charity body, Dollywood Foundation, which funds scholarships for poor students in her state. The Foundation also provides every child in the state with a new book until the age of five -- every month. Unable to have children herself, she is quite an extraordinary matriarch in raising 5 of her siblings and supporting 100 relatives with her wealth.

"Well, I try to be sharing and giving. They can have half of everything I got, I'm there for them. I think, God didn't let me have children, so everybody's children could be mine."

What an exceptional view on a mishap from an exceptional woman! She had received no higher education, and yet she has a bigger heart than any of the business tycoons in Hong Kong. May God keep on gracing her with blessings.

Quotes from Private Eye

I couldn't help quoting funny mocking stories from Private Eye:

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ONLY IN THE EYE

'Latin For Beginners'
by Harry Mountainofcash

Chapter 1: Conjugating Verbs (present tense)

Tesco = I build a superstore
Tescas = You go shopping there
Tescat = He closes down his local shop
Tescamus = We make even more money
Tescatis = You feel guilty about it
Tescant = They can't stop us

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Hahahaha!

The irony of Private Eye

I went to Tesco yesterday and bought a copy of 'Private Eye' (issue 1177, 2 Feb - 15 Feb) off the shelf.

This is my first time I've ever bought it. What attracted me to spend a quid and 40p for it was its cover. It featured Tony Blair and John Reid who laughed heartily together as if they were sharing a joke.

In the text messages, Blair says:
"You can't send me to prison."
[Due to the cash-for-honour scandal, Blair had been interviewed by the police twice about his involvment of the scandal]

"Because they are full," replies John Reid, the Home Secretary.
[Reid had been criticised for not putting criminals behind bars because the prisons were already full. He had instructed the judges to sentence only the most dangerous criminals to jail.]

This is truly British humour: there's always certain degree of truth in the statement that makes the victims hard to defend. Here's another good example:

Channel 4 has been under fire from the outraged TV audience that some racist remarks against the Indians were allowed to be aired on the real-life show "Big Brother" -- named after George Orwell's well-known phrase "Big Brother is watching you" in his book 1984. Because of such racist remarks, the principal sponsor of the TV programme suspended its financial support at once. In addition, there was an outcry from the Indian sector who threatened to boycott Channel 4. Some even demanded the TV station fire the directors and top management who were responsible for such racist remarks.

In Private Eye, there was a small announcement like this:

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A Pompous Statement from Channel Four

Channel Four is firmly against the bullying of minority groups and deplores any attempt to incite hatred against any person on the grounds of who they are or where they come from; particularly if the victims of this bullying are directors of national boradcasting companies.

These people have an absolute right not to be abused merely because they work for Channel Four and because they happen to belong to a small group of individuals who believe that Big Brother should continue to be shown on national television.

We believe that using insulting or pejorative language to describe Channel Four directors is unacceptable, particularly phrases such as 'cynical, greedy tossers' or 'cowardly, self-serving hypocrites'.

Worst of all is the intimidatory call for Channel Four directors to "Go home and get someone decent to run the Channel". Such remarks are merely the result of the kind of ignorance and stupidity that are all too prevalent in a society which has been reduced to watching Big Brother.

Channel Poor
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Ha ha! I guess I'd become a long-time subscriber of Private Eye soon!